There's a Sucker Born Every Minute

Okay...so I'm a smart person, at least I like to think so, but today I'm questioning my brilliancy. I'm minding my own business, sitting on my couch and reading my book. It's the middle of the day, my one year old is finally down for a nap and ahhh.....peace. I'm quietly sipping my drink enjoying my time when the doorbell rings. Crap. I hate that. Do I answer? My usual thing to do is to not answer. I don't know why I answered, but I did. I open the door and there standing there is a young guy(maybe 19 or 20) and I think oh shit. I don't want to talk to you, but it's too late. I crack the door and he introduces himself. I can't remember his name. He's standing there with a goofy grin on his face, which is all red from the heat, sweat pouring down and trying to be funny. He's wearing a baseball cap, he's pretty thin and he has green eyes. (I only know that because he shared that with me when he asked me my favorite color and I said green---lo and behold his fav is green too!)

He tells me that he's in some contest and he needs to collect points so he can earn money towards a trip and $10,000. (Whatever) Then he proceeds to show me pictures of the 3 places he can go on his trip-all tropical and expensive. He asks me where I would go if I could. I tell him Hawaii and he says...yeah..not the place I'm going. He's going to go to Puerto Rico because he can speak Spanish. He notices my cat and takes this opportunity to continue his spiel by asking me if I can guess what he wants to be (I guess he means when he grows up and he's not smoozing innocents like myself out of hard-earned money). I take a stab in the dark and guess "A Vet?" Of course it's amazing I can't believe it, but I'm right! Who'd a thunk? (Mental eye roll---thanks Stephanie Plum)

The next thing he does is tell me that I can help him by looking at these little cards he magically produces from his pocket and deciding on which points I want to give him today. I had the choice between a 2 point card and a 4 point card. If you have never seen this before it's magazine titles with points designated next to them. I don't really know where the 2 points and 4 points comes in, because the numbers next to each title were all different and in the hundreds.

As I'm looking and thinking that I don't want a magazine and trying to figure out how to say this nicely, he figures out a way to get into my house by telling me he needs to record my name as proof that he has spoken to me. Lord! I could have been killed. What is going on? Anyway, he walks in, finds my table and proceeds to ask me my name so that he can write it down. On what you ask? Yes, on one of those 3 carbon receipt things. Okay...now I know I'm being suckered into a magazine for sure(I'm a freaking genius) and I finally decide on Nick Jr. for my 9 year old. Nothing else looked good, but now I'm remembering right this minute that Nick Jr. is not for 9 year olds...it's for toddlers. Arrggg....

He finishes filling in the receipt and proceeds to tell me that I will be receiving 45 issues for the grand total of $72.50! What? So, I say..Wait..what if I don't want 45 issues. Sorry he says it's a package deal. So do I tell him never mind I don't want it? Of course not....I write the check.

I'm not saying that I don't like to help people out, but that is ridiculous. I just paid almost $100 for a magazine that no one in this family will even want to read. Duh! Lesson #251 on why you should not answer the doorbell in the middle of the day on a weekday: It's going to cost you a lot of money. (PS: Lesson # 1 is you might open the door to a killer) I should have gone back to lesson #1.